I Swear, It's Only Porn

This topic contains 4 replies, has 5 voices, and was last updated by  Wendolin 1 month, 1 week ago.

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  • #13291
     JoAnn 
    Keymaster

    I think the ‘I swear, it’s only porn‘ is right up at the top of our list of stupid things sex addicts say.

    Coming in right close behind are:

    I was just curious (this one is good for almost anything you discover from chat rooms to craigslist to S&M to strip clubs to fucking hookers to fucking trannies to fucking other men to fucking your best friend or your sister/brother or your dog).

    I looked but never…
    contacted her/him
    met her/him
    kissed her/him
    had sex with her/him

    I went there but chickened out.

    We met but didn’t do anything.

    It was only a blow job.

    We had sex but it I didn’t enjoy it.

    We had sex but it didn’t mean anything.

    It was only one.

    It was only once.

    And, lest we forgot the ‘I can’t remember‘ that covers absolutely everything.

    And, the list goes on and on and on.

  • #13355
     Jen 
    Participant

    I have heard every. Single one.

  • #13357
     Ashlee 
    Participant

    I’ve heard most of those. For those that have heard these before, does it ever stop?:/

  • #13359
     Jodie B 
    Participant

    He only does because he feels scared and ashamed to tell me what he wants me to do to him.

    Considering I know intricately word for word what he wants me to do I cannot see how he has not been able to express this….it’s his bullshit excuse to do what he does, then get off sexually on insisting on telling me again what he wants, and by saying that I’m the only one he wants to fulfil these desires.

    These are hardcore extreme sex acts… not only do I not get a say on how I feel or if I want to, I don’t get to say anything about his past actions and how I’m affected by them, and basically it becomes if I don’t then he has an excuse to go back to this behaviour.

    Either way I don’t exist as anything other than a sex toy who now has no interest in having sex with him, who now self medicates to detach, who now feels mentally fucked up, and who can’t say a word without triggering responses from him that just make everything more fucking confusing…..

    and so I checkout in a foggy haze of meth most every weekend and now three years have passed and I don’t like leaving my house, I don’t socialise, I don’t feel passionate about things I like….I don’t make art, I don’t even like having to get dressed and I don’t know myself. Yesterday I sought professional help and hope there is someone who can understand what’s going on.

    It’s only porn? Sure

    • This reply was modified 1 month, 1 week ago by  Jodie B.
    • #13361
       Wendolin 
      Participant

      It comes to an end when we gather our strength and leave. How many years do you want to waste? I spent 5 and I am exhausted beyond belief. I am too old for this shit. I am leaving in 5 days. I will grieve. I will fully express my anger and I will GTFO!!!!!!

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